Friday, May 2, 2014

The Writer's Voice Contest! My Entry

Hi everyone! I wrote my first novel for NaNoWriMo last November and have been working hard at it ever since. It's finished, so now I'm questing for an agent. Here I present my query and the first 250 words of my manuscript, entitled "This Is It." 


How can your life change and open up if you let more people in?

Seventeen-year-old Sadie Snow’s social circle consists almost entirely of emotionally distant Amber and virtual big brother Ethan. When Amber dumps her without a word, Sadie is left hurt and confused. She turns to Ethan, who has always been her rock, for support, confident that he’ll be there for her.

When Sadie’s long-time crush, pseudo-bad-boy Anderson, is kicked out of his house, Sadie’s social worker mom takes him into their home. Still reeling from the loss of her best friend, Sadie finds herself drifting towards Anderson, who, much to Sadie's surprise, returns her affections.

As Sadie comes to grips with losing Amber, Sadie and Anderson grow closer every day, while Ethan drifts further away. Concerned about her friend, Sadie confronts Ethan and he admits a game-changing secret. Sadie must decide if changing the terms of her friendships is worth the risk of losing them.

This Is It is a contemporary YA and a standalone. It would appeal to readers of Kasie West’s “The Distance Between Us” and Robin Constantine’s “The Promise of Amazing.” It’s complete at 69,000 words.

First 250 (265):

I am no modern day Juliet, and yet, here I stand, perched on my balcony, the cold New England air curling around me, caressing me in its cold embrace. Below me stands Romeo - two Romeos, actually. Of course, they aren't my Romeos, though they would make some Juliet very happy. And if they aren't my Romeos, then I am not Juliet, and I'm leaning out my window, not standing on some grand balcony.

Instead, I am just me, their closest female friend, their surrogate little sister, the girl they come to with their problems. I'm fine with this role - I've held it for years - but that isn't to say I wouldn't mind having my very own Romeo standing below my window, waiting for the chance to spend even a moment with me. 

“Sadie!” Ethan calls, smiling up at me while Drew bounces around in what I gather is an attempt to stay warm. The rocks in the driveway grate against each other as he jumps, and I find myself glad that my neighbors aren’t home right now so that Drew can’t drive them crazy with the noise.

“What are you two doing? It’s freezing out here,” I whisper, my breath floating out in front of me like a cloud

“We want to go for a walk downtown and grab some coffee,” Ethan explains, his hand cupped around his mouth like a megaphone. Drew nods, adding a plaintive,Please hurry before I freeze!” He jumps around some more, his red sweatshirt hood flying behind him like a superhero cape, his brown hair flopping in his eyes. 


  1. I like the slow and easy vibe of reality in your first 250. Nice work! Good luck in the contest!

  2. Hey thank you so much! That's very nice of you to say :)

  3. Sounds fantastic! I like your voice. Good luck:-)

  4. I'm a sucker for first lines, and yours is excellent! Good luck in the contest!

    1. Excellent, thanks! I reworked the whole beginning when that first line hit me in the shower the other day :)

  5. Great opening! I love the Romeo and Juliet imagery and the New England vibe :)